Snickers are the superior chocolate to Milky Ways

Jamison Guice, Campus Carrier features editor

Sticky fingers, chocolate-ringed mouths, melted chocolate and oogie-gooey goodness. A childhood treat that has now grown into an adult obsession, chocolate never ceases to surprise the eater. So, calling all chocolate fanatics! What is your favorite fondue combination? Your favorite treat? What about your favorite candy bar? 

As the age-old debate goes, Snickers are far superior to Milky Ways. Although this has been a source of contention throughout even my own life, I no longer find myself stuck in the aisle juggling the two chocolatey choices. 

So, while the candy bar hierarchy is incredibly important to anyone that despises dark chocolate, I do dare say my candy bar knowledge can be trusted since my go-to snack consists only of the sugary sweetness. Below are five reasons why Snickers are superior to Milky Ways. These are both for your purpose and for the next time I am standing confused in the gas station aisle. 

One, the crunch factor. As a lover of peanuts, how could I not rate this factor above all else? By adding nuts to a chocolate bar, this adds a level of umami to which a Milky Way could not possibly compare. The indescribable flavor of peanuts mixed with nougat, chocolate and caramel allows for a definite crunch that a Milky Way could never deliver. 

Two, the nut-flavored nougat is delicious. This lightly flavored creme adds a light reprieve from the heavy flavors layered inside the Snickers. In comparison, a Milky Way contains chocolate nougat which results in it tasting very one-dimensional since the only flavor you taste is milk chocolate. 

Three, relatively speaking, a Snickers is thicker and, going by all reasonable logic, that makes it more delicious. Packed to the seal, you will never bite into a Snickers and find a little gaping hole where the filling is missing. I can guarantee that Snickers will deliver 100 percent on ingredients. 

Four, while this may seem superficial, the Snickers wrapper is much more enticing than a Milky Way. I am more likely to grab something that has striking colors than something that blends into the cardboard carton. 

Five, nostalgia. This reason may not apply to you, but I rank Snickers over a Milky Way due to the memories I associate with it. From watching childhood cartoons on Sunday morning to late-night car rides with my dad to sneakily snagging one off the kitchen counter before dinner, biting into a Snickers is the perfect way to reminisce. 

So, if you ever find yourself about to buy a Milky Way instead of a Snickers, be certain that you have considered all of your options. Do you have a peanut allergy? If the answer is no, then you have made the wrong decision. If the answer is yes, then you still have made the wrong decision, but I would recommend having an EpiPen nearby. 

In the end, candy bars and chocolate are all about the feelings they bring you, but Snickers are still far superior to any other candy, especially Milky Ways. 

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